Lets get out of here

I paid my mortgage this morning and felt all giddy and homeowner-y and happy and then I came home to drain flies in my bathtub. It is a bitch to get rid of drain flies and so far nothing has worked. This is the part where it sucks being the landlord. When the toilet broke (twice!) I had to only pay a small fraction of what it would have cost to get a plumber on a Sunday because of my home warranty. Will I have this to fall back on forever? No. Not working has let a restlessness settle on my heart. I want to get up and get in my car and drive to California, or Mexico or Canada. I want to do something and not nothing. I want to pull an Christopher McCandless and get the fuck away. I feel sad and akward that I cannot let boys get close to me romantically. My skin crawls at the thought of anyone touching me and yet I miss it.