I told my most talkative ex boyfriend to back off last night; "I don't think we should talk anymore...or at least for awhile." I have been wanting to sever this strange rekindling since well, it started flaring up again. I don't care for him or his personality and I haven't in years; he is exactly the same and it hasn't been cute to me since 2004. His alcoholism is no longer enchanting, his late night text messages ("Sorry I called you a condescending whore last night") are certainly no longer welcome but the tippity top reason I need to shake this off is because he is the worst possible scenario for me and always will be. I have shrugged off the majority of my toxic relationships, whether it be ex boyfriends, friends, family members whatever. If there really is a line to walk, I am following it so straight it's dizzying. I haven't made a new friend in ages, and even longer yet is my dating pool. I keep picking guys out of it and then throwing them back in and then picking them right back out again. It really is time for me to put myself "out there" and make new friends and do newer things. There are no Sadie Hawkins dances around here and there certainly aren't any gymnasium immunizations coming up for me to meet my own Cry Baby at. My best shot for meeting a man would be a home health agency therapist, a crosswalk passerby or someone who works for Red Cross (I donate blood religiously). According to all of my exes I am: a ballbreaker, a nag, a busy body, a person who hates sleep, overly antagonistic, too interested, loves jewelry unnaturally, loud, bossy, over confident, abrasive and rudely charismatic. These are all true sentiments spewed forth to me by boys who are to this very day still: alcoholic, sex-addicted, unemployed/ underemployed/ hates their job, lethargic, sloppy, unhygienic, unromantic, rude, standoffish, and selfish lovers. Only one of the entire bunch brought me to a full on, hands on achieved orgasm. That is depressing. And just for good measure and my closing sentiment, last year on Valentine's Day I wanted to do something nice for my boyfriend. I ordered him an Edible Arrangement and wanted it delivered to his work. It didn't get there until the day after and when he got it he called me to say "I hate it, why did you do that!? You just wish you could be with someone who would do things like that for you and I will never be that person."
