Oh well

You stupid fucking idiot. What did you think? That I would open? That's nice, so nice how you thought I would be there, but I wasn't. I can't even think of how pathetic that must have been. What would we have done? Said goodbye so akwardly and let that be it? What is there left to say? It's ok, I mean, it's going to be ok. You are not anywhere near mine and I could be making all of this up in my head anyway, what the fuck do I know. I cum with your name on my tongue, I dream and wake up to your ghost. You get to have that for now but it's already wearing off. You'll not forget me though, you'll remember how it was and how it could have been and that will be it; my name will be the one dripping off of you and you'll not even get the satisfaction of knowing what I'm like, tasting who I am. 

Sail away

It was cold sitting here thinking and wishing on you, hoping you'd come and say goodbye. Now I'm warming slowly in my big bed gazing off at the lamp I paid to have fixed; new crystals and insulators and an Edison bulb to make it cool before people cared. I've got my hands in my braided hair full of promise and tendrils awaiting your fingers tugging. I waited and checked my phone and waited some more and you really did it, you really didn't come. It smarts and stings, I really thought you'd come. Summon my heart. Listen to Fever Ray and lights candles in the bathroom mirror and say a wish and then remember my cheeks flushed with excitement and that time you just wrapped me up like a baby out of the bath in your arms. Fit my star into your heart and see what I could show you. Locks and keys are just fine I guess but I have secrets, passwords, my sex will crack the code to your life I swear it. Won't you even try? My lips are ruddy and red, burnt by today's sun and yet I would kiss you like they had been at the spa all day. You've got my ticket, you've drawn my card, i need to get to you someway somehow I swear to god. You never got to see my mural or my exposed breasts, fleshed out white skin and pink nipples firming awaiting fingertips. Give me you, only if for a night. That's all I really need from you, before you sail away from us and go on again with her. Don't disappoint me. 

How can I tell you

That I love you 

And you're crazy

And I'm so into you.